Day 5

     Every day of this process has had its ups and downs. I am happy to say that today was mostly ups. Luckily, the thing that ruined it came at the very end of the day (can't say that I am surprised by it) but that is all I am going to say on that! Today was a good day and I am going to focus on that! I woke up to the sound of my oldest son calling "Mommy, wake up!" from down the hall. Any day that I wake up to that voice is a good day :) It was the first day that we didn't really have anything on the agenda so we just kind of hung out most of the day. I was able to finish my history final project and get it turned in, so that is one less thing to worry about. I do still have a math final to do, so I will probably try to get that done tomorrow night, depending on if the kids will let me!
    We went to the BX and picked up some things. I got a phone card and some other items for my adopted soldier. He is deployed and his wife is a contractor and is over there as well. They have a 2 year old son back in the states staying with a relative, so my heart really goes out to them and I am so glad that I can offer even just a little help. And even though I adopted him, I am able to send things for both of them, so it is nice to know that I am helping more than just one person. I gave him the number and pin for the phone card earlier and I could tell that he was very grateful for it. I just wish there was more that I could do!
    Tomorrow afternoon I have a photo shoot, so it will be my first time leaving the boys since David left. I am a little worried because Aiden started showing signs of separation anxiety before David even left. Both boys have been fine since David left, but me leaving on top of that, even only for a little bit, might be magnified by the fact that David has been gone for a week now. Tomorrow will have to kind of be the test run, I suppose. If they do not do ok with me leaving, I will have to seriously consider stepping back from the photography business for a little while, whether it be until they are able to adjust or if I have to wait til this deployment is over. Either way, the kids come first always. The babysitter will be coming here from now on, so hopefully that will make a huge difference. They will not have to be taken out of their comfort zone.
    Austin is still waking up several times a night. It is always in the first hour or two after he goes to bed, too. It's not at like 2 or 3 in the morning. So maybe it is just a matter of him getting into a good deep sleep. He made me sing him Twinkle Twinkle Little Star about 50 times tonight, then he had me hum to him for 15 minutes or so. Now he is out cold.
    I finished most of David's surprise tonight. I have one final touch that I want to add to it, but I should be able to get that done tomorrow and have it ordered! I can't wait to see how it turns out once it actually gets here and everything.
    Well, the last 20 minutes have pretty much pushed me past the point of exhaustion in more ways than one, so I am getting off of here for the night! The highlights of my day were letting Austin put all of our "groceries" on the counter when we were at the BX (He really likes to show what a big boy he is! I don't know what I would do without those boys), reading the boys their bedtime story, and singing my kids to sleep. All of the positivity that those boys brings to my life outweighs any negativity that other people throw into it! Those boys are the best thing that ever happened to me :)